For the Want of the Moon, the Marauders are Lost
by amhalgaidh-wolfegurl
Summary: The Marauders at Hogwarts, what could be more fun? Try adding Remus' two very interesting cousins one from Ravenclaw and the other from... SLYTHERIN! How much fun will Sirius have in tormenting the second? Find out.
1. Teaser Trailor

_Coming Soon…_

For the Want of the Moon, the Marauders are Lost 

Written by: Amhalgaidh-wolfegurl

_This is a preview of the abovementioned story. It was originated by Bandogurl, but she gave it to me and asked me to please finish it. But I decided, with her permission, I would improve upon it. So instead of starting during Harry's sixth year, it begins while the Marauders are all still alive and well as students at Hogwarts. Torri Love now becomes Taryn, and goes from Remus' love to his cousin—with no incest anywhere. Ew. Anyways, here's your sneak preview:_

"Taryn, get back here!"

"No!" she shouted over her shoulder as she ran through the heavy rain falling on Hogwarts grounds.

"Taryn, please stop! You'll catch pneumonia and die and then what will I tell your parents?"

"I don't care!" she shouted back at him. "Tell them anyth—!" She slipped in the mud and fell, landing on her back, laughing her head off.

"Taryn!" he said, sliding to a stop and kneeling beside her. His light brown hair was dripping into his eyes as he helped her sit up.

She stopped laughing for a moment to say, "Looks like I can't even be graceful when I'm outside in my natural element, huh, Remmie?" Then she looked down at her mud-spattered clothing and started laughing again. "All right, you win. I'll go back to the castle."

Remus Lupin stood and held his hand out for his cousin. She took hold of it and he hauled her to her feet. They were both soaking wet and covered in mud, but they didn't mind it. They enjoyed being a mess when they walked around the castle. It gave Mr. Filch, the new caretaker, something else to grumble about. As long as they didn't get detention. "C'mon, Taryn," Remus said. "Let's go. Sirius and James said they had an idea on how to spend this wretched night."

"I like the rain, though," she said, wiping her dripping blonde hair from her face. "Sure, it's wet and cold, but honestly, how many witches or wizards can say they can cast spells more easily in the rain? It makes me unique."

"What makes you unique is the fact that you spend time with me even though I am what I am," he replied as they climbed the stairs to the castle. "Not many people would do that, not even relatives."

"Well, you're my little cousin," she said, ruffling his hair. "What else am I supposed to do? I have to look out for you."

* * *

Lily rolled her eyes and looked pointedly at Remus. "She's showing signs of being in Slytherin again, Remus," she said. "Perhaps an intervention is in order?"

He shook his head. "The last time I intervened, I ended up in Hospital for a week with a Latin Complex," he said, shuddering at the memory. The entire week, he could say nothing unless it was in Latin. He still didn't know how she did it. "_You_ do the intervention this time."

"It's just a Cheering Charm, Remus," she said quietly.

* * *

Sirius literally jumped onto the bed and draped himself across Taryn's middle as she tried to recuperate from the day. "If you actually _hit_ Snivellus with that curse," he said, playing with her hair. "You have to accept the next proposal he offers you. And any suggestion of his that you start your tutoring session for the day doesn't count."

Taryn sat up quickly, horror etched in her face. As the others giggled, trying to hide it unsuccessfully, she said, "No! Sirius, you can't be serious! He's—he's—oh, he's horrid! No matter how much I may defend him from your taunting—or try to, at least—I detest him as much as you do!" She shuddered as Sirius sat up next to her. "The only _proposal_ he offers me is one I refuse almost daily. I can't accept it, Sirius. I can't!"

"You can," he said, tapping her on the nose. "And you will."

"I can't, and I won't," she said, pushing him away from her. "You can't make me."

Sirius grinned wickedly. "Yes I can," he said. "I _dare_ you to accept it." He knew she couldn't turn down a dare. No matter how horrible it may be. She couldn't help herself.

* * *

"_Sirius Black!_" The Great Hall fell silent as the shout echoed away. The teachers eating breakfast ignored it; they heard it a lot. Lily and Colleen backed away from the Gryffindor table and joined their own House as Taryn stormed over. She grabbed the collar of Sirius' school robes and nearly yanked him off his seat. When his face was level with hers, all his weight being supported by his robes in her clutches, she said, "You will die. Very soon." She tossed him back onto his seat and walked out of the Great Hall very quickly.

* * *

"Then what would you suggest?" Colleen countered. "If you don't give her a reason to pay attention to you, she won't."

A grin spread across Sirius' face. "I might have an idea," he said. "Col, she's rather over-protective of you, isn't she?"

"Yes," the Ravenclaw witch nodded. Then she understood what he was talking about. "Sirius, if we do that, she'll kill you!"

"I'm willing to risk it," he replied.

* * *

His comments struck a chord. "Listen to me, Black," she said lowly. "When the Death Eaters murdered our parents, I became her guardian. Yes, I know I can't protect her from life, but I can at least make sure _you_ don't make her miserable! So, I'll be watching you. Just see if I don't!"

* * *

"Oh obviously," he repeated, sarcastically. He leaned forward and looked her in the eye. "I'm curious, Tar. Who is it you think you could marry happily?"

Her flustered feeling increased. No one had asked her that, either. "I suppose…" she began, then changed her mind. "Well… I don't know. Maybe, well… I don't think I can answer that, Sirius." She stood and walked out of the Room of Requirement.

Sirius watched her go with interest. She hit the doorframe with her shoulder on her way out. He leaned back in his chair and thought. "That's interesting," he murmured after the door closed.

* * *

"Who're you?" a wizard a little older than her asked, standing over her as she tried to read her book.

She didn't look up at him. "My name's Taryn Love," she said, turning the page.

"You're not in Slytherin, are you?"

"Honestly, Sirius, is that any way to speak to a young lady?" She knew that voice. It was her cousin, Remus Lupin. She looked up and saw the familiar honey brown eyes smiling down at her. "Hick-a-bick-a-boo?" he asked her, using the language they made up when they were children.

"Hoo-sha!" she replied, smiling and getting to her feet. Fethais 'ch, Midnight. Fel fuest?"

He shrugged. "Okay," he said, ignoring the look he was getting from the other wizard. "Dydy 'n annaearol mo yn cael 'ch ai Colleen i mewn 'm D. Pawb was fel 'n ddiau ni would pawb bod i mewn Gryffindor, faen mo?"

"Yeah, bydew… Certainties ydy erioed 'n ddiau, n?" Taryn said, smiling slightly.

"Um, hello?" Sirius, the other wizard said. "Still here and I would appreciate it if you spoke English."

Taryn looked at him and smirked. "Cara at gwrandaw i mewn acha arall s hymddanion, ewigod emo?" she muttered to Remus. "Ddylu stgofia a?"

"'n ddichonadwy."

Sirius, the other wizard, growled in annoyance and stalked off. Taryn smirked again. "Alla anrhega 'i atalnwyd, Remus?"

* * *

Taryn talked animatedly to Sirius as she quickly drove her ice blue Chrysler Pacifica down the empty stretch of rural road in California. He was clutching the armrests on his seat and door tightly, grinding his teeth in absolute terror. "Slow down, girl!" he said, digging his nails into the vehicle's upholstery. "This isn't the Knight Bus, you know!"

"Sirius, honestly," she sighed, slowing down. "One would think you had never been in a car before, the way you act! You're perfectly safe. Now, stop damaging my baby." She smiled as she cruised down the road. "Besides, we need to get there as soon as possible. There's been an emergency. Instead of a missing per_son_, it's more like missing per_sons_. Multiple, and the American Ministry of Magic, the dolts, doesn't have a Missing People Because of an Act of Magical War department. So I was despatched. That's why we're here."

"I didn't ask," he said, looking through the glass of his window. "Not yet, anyway. Get out of my head!"

She laughed. "Why would I _want_ to be in there?" she asked, sarcastically, making a left turn and taking it without slowing down. "You're probably thinking of things I don't want to see." She glanced at him. "You _are_, aren't you?"

"Maybe," he replied, grinning at her. Then he looked through the windshield to see on coming traffic safely on the other side of the road. "Taryn, look out!"

A large, black Suburban was in their lane and coming at them at an insane speed. She tried to swerve out of the way, but there was nowhere to go. So she hit her brakes and blew her horn. Hard. But all her efforts were for naught. As the headlights came closer, Taryn screamed, "Sirius!" Then she was knocked unconscious by the impact of the large SUV against her smaller car.

Sirius watched in horror as she hit her head on the steering wheel in front of her and as the glass of the front window shattered, hitting them both, cutting them, not deeply, but many times over. The front end of the Pacifica smashed itself into itself, pinning Sirius and Taryn into their seats. He reached over for her hand and felt it to be icy cold at his touch. Fearing the worst, but hoping for the best, Sirius passed out, wondering if she was still alive and if she was, would she and the second life she was carrying be okay after this…

_And that's all I'm giving you! Hee, hee. I'm mean. But there you go. There's your preview. You can make your own assumptions about it, and you'll probably be wrong unless your QueenMaple or Elestren. But you can just wait until I finish The Beginning of the End before I'll post the beginnings of For the Want of the Moon, the Marauders are Lost. Hee, hee. I'm evil._

—_amhalgaidh-wolfegurl_


	2. 1 That's What I Call Talent

Chapter One: That's What I Call Talent

"Taryn, get back here!"

"No!" she shouted over her shoulder as she ran through the heavy rain falling on Hogwarts grounds.

"Taryn, please stop! You'll catch pneumonia and die and then what will I tell your parents?"

"I don't care!" she shouted back at him. "Tell them anyth—!" She slipped in the mud and fell, landing on her back, laughing her head off.

"Taryn!" he said, sliding to a stop and kneeling beside her. His light brown hair was dripping into his eyes as he helped her sit up.

She stopped laughing for a moment to say, "Looks like I can't even be graceful when I'm outside in my natural element, huh, Remus?" Then she looked down at her mud-spattered clothing and started laughing again. "All right, you win. I'll go back to the castle."

Remus Lupin stood and held his hand out for his cousin. She took hold of it and he hauled her to her feet. They were both soaking wet and covered in mud, but they didn't mind it. They enjoyed being a mess when they walked around the castle. It gave Mr. Filch, the new caretaker, something else to grumble about. As long as they didn't get detention. "C'mon, Taryn," Remus said. "Let's go. Sirius and James said they had an idea on how to spend this wretched night."

"I like the rain, though," she said, wiping her dripping blonde hair from her face. "Sure, it's wet and cold, but honestly, how many witches or wizards can say they can cast spells more easily in the rain? It makes me unique."

"What makes you unique is the fact that you spend time with me even though I am what I am," he replied as they climbed the stairs to the castle. "Not many people would do that, not even relatives."

"Well, you're my little cousin," she said, ruffling his hair. "What else am I supposed to do? I have to look out for you."

"You're only a few months older, Taryn," he reminded her. "Don't get high and mighty. It's not befitting of you."

She smiled, crinkling her nose. "I know," she said. "But it's fun." They stopped at the main staircase. "So, I'll meet you guys in an hour? Room of Requirement or One-Eyed Witch?"

"Room of Requirement, I'm sure," Remus said as she turned and made her way down to the dungeons and her Common Room.

* * *

True to her word, an hour later, Taryn silently and sneakily made her way to the Room of Requirement on the seventh floor. She entered the room and looked around. Remus was there already. As were Sirius Black, James Potter, Lily Evans, and Peter Pettigrew. Taryn wished for just _once_ that Peter wouldn't follow James and Sirius everywhere. "Where's Colleen?" she asked, realising her sister, only a year her younger, was unmistakably and undeniably absent. "What, did you forget about her _again?_ You—" she pointed at James, "—go get her."

James smirked, threw his Invisibility Cloak over his shoulders and disappeared from sight. Taryn pulled a small mirror out of her jacket pocket and said, "Colleen."

Her sister's face appeared in the mirror. "What?" she asked.

"James is coming to pick you up," Taryn said. Colleen looked a little confused. "Hello? Wednesday night. Remember?"

"Ah, yes," the younger witch nodded.

Taryn shook her head and pocketed the mirror, muttering, "Silly girl."

Sirius sidled up to Taryn and slipped an arm around her waist. "So, how old is your baby sister about now?" he asked.

"Fifteen," she replied, taking his arm off her waist. "And, Sirius?"

"Yeah?"

"Back off."

"Sorry," he said, backing away from her with his hands raised in defence. "Didn't mean to offend. Just asking after your sister."

"I know that," she said, sneering slightly. She walked over to a tall cabin double bed and climbed onto it. "Let her alone, Black." She laid down and sighed, closing her eyes.

Lily walked over and leaned on the side of the bed, hooking her elbows over the wooden side guards. "Why do you always need a bed in here?" she asked, curiosity getting the best of her. "Are you really that tired all the time?"

Taryn turned onto her side and said, "Yes, Lil, I am. Besides, I only have it because I can." She turned onto her back and went back to relaxing.

Lily rolled her eyes and looked pointedly at Remus. "She's showing signs of being in Slytherin again, Remus," she said. "Perhaps an intervention is in order?"

He shook his head. "The last time I intervened, I ended up in Hospital for a week with a Latin Complex," he said, shuddering at the memory. The entire week, he could say nothing unless it was in Latin. He still didn't know how she did it. "_You_ do the intervention this time."

"It's just a Cheering Charm, Remus," she said quietly.

"Still," he replied as the door opened and James and Colleen appeared. "You're better at Charmwork, anyway."

Colleen rolled her eyes and pulled out her wand. "Oh, for goodness' sake," she said. "_I'll_ do it." She pointed her wand at her sister and muttered the Charm. Immediately, Taryn's wand was out and pointed at Colleen. A bright beam of indigo light shot at her. Colleen ducked and the spell hit the door behind her. "Honestly, Tar. What was that for?"

"You know I hate Cheering Charms," Taryn muttered. "They make me slightly ill for a few hours." She opened an eye to see if she hit her target. When she saw she hadn't, she muttered, "Drat. I wanted to see someone with a _Jekyll & Hyde_ Complex. That would have been funny to see."

"You just might," James said, tossing his Invisibility Cloak onto a table. "We passed Snivellus in the corridors. He looked like he was looking for someone to rat out or something. We think he followed us here. Don't know how, though."

Taryn settled into her pillows and blankets. "Well, then," she said, smiling a little. The Cheering Charm was taking effect. "That'll be lovely if I got him. Through a door, even. That's what I call talent."

"Stop being such a shrake, Taryn," Sirius said. "I've just had an idea."

"Don't hurt yourself," she muttered. "All right. Let's hear it."

Sirius literally jumped onto the bed and draped himself across Taryn's middle as she tried to recuperate from the day. "If you actually _hit_ Snivellus with that curse," he said, playing with her hair. "You have to accept the next proposal he offers you. And any suggestion of his that you start your tutoring session for the day doesn't count."

Taryn sat up quickly, horror etched in her face. As the others giggled, trying to hide it unsuccessfully, she said, "No! Sirius, you can't be serious! He's—he's—oh, he's horrid! No matter how much I may defend him from your taunting—or try to, at least—I detest him as much as you do!" She shuddered as Sirius sat up next to her. "The only _proposal_ he offers me is one I refuse almost daily. I can't accept it, Sirius. I can't!"

"You can," he said, tapping her on the nose. "And you will."

"I can't, and I won't," she said, pushing him away from her. "You can't make me."

Sirius grinned wickedly. "Yes I can," he said. "I _dare_ you to accept it." He knew she couldn't turn down a dare. No matter how horrible it may be. She couldn't help herself.

Taryn glared at him. "Fine," she said. "But, I'm sure, come breakfast, you'll know exactly why I said I couldn't."

"I'm sure."

……


	3. 2 This Will Prove Interesting

Chapter Two: This Will Prove Interesting

The next morning, Sirius, James and Remus looked for Taryn to come to breakfast. Peter was running late again. It was only the third week of classes and he managed to be late for _everything_. Lily and Colleen went straight to the Gryffindor table when they walked into the Great Hall, both were grinning. "Ooh, Sirius," Colleen said. "She's mad. Really mad. I'd watch it."

"Why?" he asked, craning his neck to see the doors of the Hall. "What happened?"

Lily giggled a little and said, "She did hit Severus through the door. How she did it is beyond me." She covered her mouth as fresh giggles surfaced. "I don't know what he asked her, but she's royally ticked."

"_Sirius Black!_" The Great Hall fell silent as the shout echoed away. The teachers eating breakfast ignored it; they heard it a lot. Lily and Colleen backed away from the Gryffindor table and joined their own House as Taryn stormed over. She grabbed the collar of Sirius' school robes and nearly yanked him off his seat. When his face was level with hers, all his weight being supported by his robes in her clutches, she said, "You will die. Very soon." She tossed him back onto his seat and walked out of the Great Hall very quickly.

Those who were watching the exchange laughed, then returned to their breakfast. Remus shook his head. "I knew it was a bad idea," he muttered, returning to his toast. "I knew it was a bad idea to dare her to that, Sirius."

Sirius rubbed his neck and adjusted his robes. "Really," he replied dryly. "And why was it a bad idea?"

"Didn't you know Severus has had a crush on her for years?" Remus asked lowly, leaning across the table. "He's asked her out at least once a week for the past three years, hoping that by some miracle, she would change her mind." He leaned back into his chair and munched on his toast. "So, apparently, we will have a very happy Severus Snape and a very furious Taryn to deal with today."

"If he lets her anywhere near us, that is," James said, pouring syrup over his tall stack of waffles. "You know how he gets about her skiving off tutoring to hang with us. He gets all pale and angry. As though he would love nothing more than to finish us off so he can have her company to himself."

"It wouldn't surprise me if that were true," Remus said lightly as Peter finally got to the table and plunked down next to him. "Awfully early in the year to be running late, Peter. You should probably invest in an alarm clock. I'm not going to wake you this year. Or next year."

"It figures you wouldn't," Peter muttered, grabbing a biscuit and spreading a thick layer of butter on it. "By the way, have you seen Snape today? It's almost like he's suffering from Split-Personality Disorder or something. One second, he'll be extremely happy and almost smiling. And the next, he's scowling and throwing things and cursing passers by. D'you suppose she got him with her curse?"

"Yes, Peter," the other three muttered.

He looked surprised. "Oh," he said. "Then, that explains why he was trying to kiss her in the corridor on my way down here."

James, Sirius and Remus dropped whatever was in their hands. "_What?_"

Peter nodded, his mouth full. "Yep," he said, spraying crumbs everywhere. "He tried to kiss her and then she shoved him into a wall." He swallowed a bit of pumpkin juice. "At least I think she shoved him. I didn't actually see her touch him. She said something like, 'back off.' And he flew into the wall."

Remus wiped his hands on his napkin. "So she's agreeing to something, but she's definitely not happy about it," he said. "I wonder if she's agreeing to a certain something, and not allowing him the full benefit of it…"

"If you could possibly make sense for once, it would be appreciated, Moony," James said.

Remus stared into space as he muttered to himself. After a minute, he stood and said, "I need to talk to her." Then, he left the Great Hall.

"Nutter, that one," Sirius muttered, taking a large bite out of his pancakes.

* * *

Remus found Taryn pacing angrily in the third floor corridor while Snape tried to convince her of something. "Taryn, don't be like this," he was saying as Remus approached. "You don't have to be so angry about it. I'm sorry."

"But I told you before," she said. "And you didn't listen to a word I said, did you?" Snape didn't answer. "Did you?" He shook his head. "I didn't think so. So, let me repeat myself: I will not kiss any man—wizard or not—until I feel I may be ready to possibly marry him. So, stop trying to force me into it!" She sighed and saw Remus. "Remus! I didn't see you there!" She looked happy to see him, which seemed a promising sign of her mental stability.

"You looked rather upset when I saw you earlier," Remus said as she walked over to him. "I just wanted to make sure you were all right. Are you?"

"Um, Severus, would you excuse us, please?" she said over her shoulder. When he started to protest, she said, "I won't be long. Just let me talk to my cousin. I'll see you in class." Snape grumbled as he walked away. Taryn pulled Remus over to a staircase and they sat down. "Remus, you need to tell Sirius that he has to choose the day I can end my suffering. Otherwise, I'll end this within the week."

"So did he ask you out again?" Remus asked softly. She nodded. "Hoo-boy… This will prove interesting…"

* * *

"I'm beginning to understand why Moony said it was a bad idea to dare her," Sirius said one Wednesday night after a few weeks of lacking Taryn's company. "We haven't seen her in weeks."

"I know," Lily said, defeating James soundly at their third game of Wizard's Chess that evening. "Her Cheering Charms is wearing off, too. Have you seen how grumpy she's been during Transfiguration? _Not_ fun."

James returned his pieces on the board and said, "It's all Snivellus' doing; I swear it is. He's a bad influence on her." He looked at Lily. "Rematch?"

"Face it, Potter," she sighed. "You've lost three times tonight. Don't make it four."

"Well, I think," Peter started, "that she's suffered enough. Don't you, Sirius?"

Sirius ignored Peter. "You've been quiet, Colleen," he said. "What do you think?"

Colleen had been sitting in a dark blue armchair by the window and was staring through the glass. "I miss her," she said lowly. "So I think one of you—James or Sirius—ought to knock her off her broom at the match on Saturday. Maybe she'll come to see the light."

James and Sirius stared at her. "You know she hates that," James said. "I don't want to suffer through one of her Complex Curses again."

"Then what would you suggest?" Colleen countered. "If you don't give her a reason to pay attention to you, she won't."

A grin spread across Sirius' face. "I might have an idea," he said. "Col, she's rather over-protective of you, isn't she?"

"Yes," the Ravenclaw witch nodded. Then she understood what he was talking about. "Sirius, if we do that, she'll kill you!"

"I'm willing to risk it," he replied.

* * *

The next morning as Taryn walked to breakfast, Dedalus Diggle, a Hufflepuff, ran over to her and said, "Have you heard, Taryn? Sirius Black finally asked your sister out and she said yes!"

"Oh, I honestly doubt it," Taryn replied. But then she saw Colleen and Sirius walking down the stairs, laughing and joking, hand in hand. "Oh, I don't _think_ so!" she muttered and walked over. Arms crossed and foot tapping, she stopped Colleen and Sirius and said, "What's going on here?"

Colleen didn't make eye contact with her sister. "Nothing," Sirius said. "You must have known it would happen eventually. You can't protect her form life forever."

His comments struck a chord. "Listen to me, Black," she said lowly. "When the Death Eaters murdered our parents, I became her guardian. Yes, I know I can't protect her from life, but I can at least make sure _you_ don't make her miserable! So, I'll be watching you. Just see if I don't!"

……


	4. 3 That's Not Very Nice

Chapter Three: Well, That's Not Very Nice

It was well into November when Taryn cornered Sirius in the Room of Requirement one afternoon. "There you are," she said, out of breath from running up and down the staircases, having to change her route several times since the staircases kept changing while she was trying to get to the seventh floor. "Sirius, we need to talk."

He looked over at her from his large, deep red, winged armchair next to the fireplace. He was reading Quidditch Through the Ages. "Oh, look who's here," he said, sticking a bookmark in the pages of his book and setting it on the floor near his feet. "You finally decided to grace us with your presence, did you?"

She looked around. They were the only two in the Room. "Um…" she said slowly. "Why are you talking in plural? I wasn't aware that you were crowned King. Should I bow or curtsy or something?"

He smiled and waved her over to him. "Nope," he said as she joined him by the fire. A forest green upholstered dining chair appeared for her to sit in. "What's wrong, Tar? You're looking rather upset. Did you need a Cheering Charm?"

"No," she said quickly. Then she nearly broke down in tears. "Sirius, you _have_ to let me break up with Snape! I'm going insane! He keeps trying to kiss me and hold my hand and hug me good night! I'm going to lose it soon and murder him or something!"

Sirius didn't look impressed. "Well, he _is_ your boyfriend," he said lightly. "I don't think you should break up with him just because he's trying to fulfil his role as your boyfriend. You should give him another chance."

Then she really did start to cry. "Sirius, _please_," she begged. "It's been eight weeks already! You know how much I can't stand him. He's going to drive me over the brink of sanity, just you wait. Please, you have to let me dump him!"

He thought about it. "No, I don't think I will," he said slowly. "Unless you can give me one good reason why."

"He keeps trying to kiss me, Sirius," she said. "Isn't that reason enough?" Sirius shook his head. "When I was younger, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't kiss a boy, or a guy, or a man until I was positive I could actually see myself happily married to him. And then, magic gets into it and now it's almost like an Unbreakable Vow with myself. Do you understand?"

"Have you explained this to Snape?" he asked her.

She nodded. "It only made him try harder," she said, wiping at her tears. "Like he's convinced that if he could get me to kiss him, I'd marry him. Can you see me married to Snape?" Sirius nodded, grinning wickedly. "I marry him, I will see to it that you are cursed with a Complex every week for the rest of your life, Sirius Black. It will be like you're a pregnant woman, only worse because half the time, no one will be able to understand a word you say."

"All right," he said, looking pale at the thought. "You can break up with him. Happy now?"

"Almost," she said. "I want you to stop dating my sister."

"Why?"

"Because I know you only got her to agree under false pretences," she said. "It isn't fair to her, Sirius. And you're not good enough for her."

"Well, that's not very nice," he said, picking up his book. "But there's another reason you don't want me to date her, though. Isn't there?"

She shook her head. "Nope," she said almost too quickly. "I just want her to be happy. I don't want her thinking all you're doing is tricking me into paying attention to you guys when I'm breaking up with the reason why I've been ignoring you. I don't want her thinking that it isn't real, when for you, it is. It's wrong to do that, Sirius. It's predatory. And icky."

"There you go, being childish again, Taryn," he said, gesturing to her. "Icky? Is that even a word?"

She felt slightly flustered. It wasn't often that someone questioned her vocabulary. "Of course it is," she protested. "It's been a word for years! It means _really gross_. Obviously."

"Oh obviously," he repeated, sarcastically. He leaned forward and looked her in the eye. "I'm curious, Tar. Who is it you think you could marry happily?"

Her flustered feeling increased. No one had asked her that, either. "I suppose…" she began, then changed her mind. "Well… I don't know. Maybe, well… I don't think I can answer that, Sirius." She stood and walked out of the Room of Requirement.

Sirius watched her go with interest. She hit the doorframe with her shoulder on her way out. He leaned back in his chair and thought. "That's interesting," he murmured after the door closed.

* * *

"Severus, we need to talk," Taryn said, pulling him from his dormitory and out into the Common Room. No one in the Slytherin House ever paid much attention to anyone else unless it pertained to them, so they wouldn't be overheard. She could've talked to him in his dormitory, but that might have given him ideas and she didn't want to risk that. She pushed him onto one of the black leather couches and sat nearby, putting at least one cushion between them. "We have to end this," she said. "I'm going insane. Mainly because it's not working out for me… And because my cousin and our friends won't stop harassing me about it. But it's not working out for me, I guess because I don't like you as much as you like me."

He didn't answer right away. He didn't even look at her directly. He sort of looked around the Common Room before he said, "So, that's that? You just want to end it? No, I'm sorry, but I'm in love with someone else or anything? It's not you, it's me? That whole pile of shit?" He looked like his _Jekyll & Hyde_ Complex hadn't worn off even after two months.

"Look, Severus, don't talk to me like that," she said, getting a little irritated.

"How am I supposed to talk to you?" he asked. "You're dumping me after someone saw you walk into the Room of Requirement after Sirius Black. It's him, isn't it? He's the reason you're breaking up with me, isn't he?"

Taryn was shocked. "What? No," she said. "Ew. He's dating my little sister!"

"Not anymore, he isn't," Snape countered. "He broke up with her after dinner." He sighed. "So, after dumping me, are you gonna run into his arms and live happily ever after?"

"I don't believe in happily ever afters, Snape," she snapped. "So, no. I'm not. I don't like him anymore than a best friend. So, I'm breaking up with you for my sanity. Not so I can date Sirius. Don't flatter yourself, Snivellus." She stood and stormed out of the Common Room, grateful it wasn't after hours yet and shocked that she called Snape _Snivellus_. That was James and Sirius' name for him. She generally called him Snape or Severus—you know, his _name._ She went to the Room of Requirement and collapsed on the cabin bed waiting for her.

* * *

"Taryn, wake up." Someone was lightly shaking her shoulder. She mumbled something, but didn't wake. "If you don't wake up, I'll curse you into oblivion!"

She sat up, wide-awake and irritated. She glared at Remus. "You can't use someone else's catch phrase, Remus," she said. "What do you want?"

"You've been sleeping here all night," he said. "The others are worried about you. Are you all right?"

Remus climbed up to sit beside her as she said, "I suppose so. But, I'm terribly confused. Does it look like I like Sirius?"

"No, you two got into a cursing competition at the last Quidditch match and it was Hufflepuff verses Ravenclaw," Remus said lightly, grabbing a pillow to lean against. "Why?"

"Because that's what Snape said I broke up with him for," she explained. "But I don't like him. I was just wondering if it looked like I do."

"Nope, you're in the clear," Remus said. "Although it is suspicious that you broke up with Snape the same day Sirius broke up with Colleen. She didn't care anyways. She said she was just happy to be single again. Dating isn't her thing apparently."

Taryn smiled. "I could've told you that," she said. She sighed and rubbed her head. "Remus, I'm so confused. I don't know what to think anymore. I _know_ I'm glad to be rid of Snape, but lately, there's been a void I've never noticed before. And every time Sirius is around, I can feel the void grow larger and larger and it gets increasingly painful every time I see him, but I'm not sure why. What do you think?"

Sirius entered the room, but ignored Remus and Taryn. "Hick-a-bick-a-boo?" Remus asked in an undertone. She whispered a quiet, "Hoo-sha." And he continued. "Dybia ach yn cerdded 'n orffwyllog, 'n sylweddol. Beth ach yn darlunio ydy rhywbeth e s chwedleuedig am chen a Iago amdanat. Namyn, m mo 'n ddiball ai e 'n weithredol caredig Colleen ai ai bu 'n annichellgar yn amseru 'i at gwna 'ch 'n eiddigeddus." He winced. "Ddylaswn mo wedi deud a." _(I think you're going insane, really. What you're describing is something he's talked about with me and James about you. But, we're not sure if he actually liked Colleen or if he was simply dating her to make you jealous… I shouldn't have said that.)_

Sirius looked over at them and rolled his eyes. "Don't worry, I can't understand you," he called over, searching for his book.

Taryn looked at Remus, puzzled. "Beth feddyli? Paham brofai at gwna 'm 'n eiddigeddus?" she asked, watching Sirius out of the corner of her eye. _(What do you mean? Why would he try to make me jealous?)_

"Dydy mo 'n bwysig, Taryn," Remus said. "Namyn beth ydy 'n bwysig ydy a ach mo yn amseru Snape anymore a a ach 'n ddedwydd." _(It's not important, Taryn… But what is important is that you're not dating Snape anymore and that you're happy.)_

"Yeah, namyn ddeudaist rhywbeth amdano yn ceisio at gwna 'm 'n eiddigeddus," she pressed. "Beth chwedleui am?" _Yeah, but you said something about him trying to make me jealous… What are you talking about?)_

Sirius made a noise of triumph and held his book aloft. "Found it!" he said, happily grinning. "All right, you two can quit with the Welsh or whatever you're speaking. I'm leaving." He flashed a not-unattractive smile at Taryn and left the room.

Taryn shoved Remus. "Tell me!" she said as he nearly fell off the bed.

"No need to shove," he muttered, pulling himself back onto the bed. He adjusted his uniform as she glared at him, waiting for an answer. "Besides the fact that there's nothing to tell. He's never outright said anything. James seems to think there's more to what he's not telling us."

"Oh, really?" she said. "And what does our esteemed Sir James Potter think? No tricks or lies, Remmie."

He sighed. "All right," he muttered. "But, tell no one I told you. James believes that Sirius was pretending to like Colleen so much because he knew how you felt about relationships and he's afraid of what you would say if he ever confessed to you how much he's in love with you. But I think he really did like your sister and unconsciously loves you."

"Really," she said quietly. "Interesting. Very interesting." Then she became instantly cheerful and very un-Slytherin-like. "Thank you!" She jumped off the bed and literally skipped to the door. In response to Remus inquiry, she turned and said, "I'm going to take a nice, long shower and get ready for the day!" She went through the door. But she stopped and stuck her head through the doorway again and asked, "What day is it today?"

Remus looked confused. "Saturday…" he said slowly.

"Thank you!" she chirped and was skipping down the corridors on her way to the Common Room. _It's a good day for jeans, a nice jumper, trainers and a day by the lake,_ she thought. _Or on the pitch… Yeah, I feel like flying.

* * *

After her shower, Taryn cheerfully made her way to her dorm to pin her hair up, swinging her wet locks over her shoulders and leaving driplets in a trail behind her. She was humming and so distracted that she didn't see Niccolai Bixby, a Ravenclaw 7th Year, until she nearly knocked the teary-eyed witch down the stairs. "Holy cricket, Niccolai!" she said, helping her to regain her balance. "I'm so sorry. Are you okay? Did I hurt you?"_

The Ravenclaw shook her head. "I'm fine," she replied. "Thank you."

Taryn saw her tears. Niccolai wasn't a girl who cried openly or in public. She tended to keep to herself. "What's wrong? Is everything all right?" she asked gently. "Did Sean do something to you?"

"No," she said. "Everything's fine. Sean didn't do anything. Don't worry about me, Taryn. Thank you, though." Then she left.

Shrugging the odd scene off, Taryn continued on her way. She turned a corner and saw Sean Wood, the Gryffindor Keeper, walking quickly towards her and looking for someone. She was going to ignore him, but he stopped her and asked, "Have you seen Niccolai? I can't find her."

Taryn pointed. Sean started running. "But don't pressure her into telling you what's wrong!" she called after him. "Sometimes, girls just need to cry!"

"Perhaps this is one of those times for you, Love," a cold voice drawled behind Taryn. She spun around and saw Lucius Malfoy sneering at her.

"Should I feel intimidated, Malfoy?" she asked, crossing her arms and tapping her foot lightly. "Because it's really difficult for me to be intimidated by a skinny pretty boy with blonde hair longer than mine like you." He was a 7th Year Slytherin, true, and, also true, she should be respecting him, but his hair _was_ long and blonde and he was in reality a wimp underneath his bloody pureblood façade.

Immediately, Malfoy's wand was out, its tip pressed against her throat. Taryn froze and didn't speak. Malfoy sneered at her. "You know, it's interesting," he said. "What everyone is saying. That Snape broke up with you. Some seem to think that _you_ broke up with him. Which is, of course, absolute rubbish." He pressed his wand harder on her throat. "It seems no one in your family is good enough for anyone. Your cousin can never seem to find himself a girl. Even your own sister was dumped. Seems a pity. Colleen's a pretty girl."

"Leave me sister alone, Malfoy," Taryn said through gritted teeth. "You have a girl. You don't need another."

"Perhaps not," he said idly. "But I feel it is my painful obligation to tell you that you're not even worthy to be in the noble House of Slytherin. You're too sweet to others, you keep your time around your filthy Mudblood-loving friends. Who knows where you'll end up, you disloyal whore."

Taryn managed to grab Malfoy's wand and threw it out the nearest open window. "How can I be disloyal to your hideous master if I was never loyal?" she asked coldly. "And I'm going to request for the final time that you leave me alone." She quickly set off for the Quidditch pitch without waiting for an answer, grabbing her broom from the girl's locker room on her way.

When she reached the pitch, Sirius and James were already there, practicing. Sirius was an excellent Beater and was proving while working with James, an excellent Seeker. But Taryn chose to ignore that fact. Even though she was a Keeper, Taryn grabbed a Beaters' club and mounted her broom. "Hey, Taryn!" Sirius called, flying over to her. She raised the club, preparing to swing, and beat a Bludger at Sirius. He cursed and weaved out of the way.

"Cripes, Tar!" James called, dodging the Bludger as well. "What's your problem?"

Sirius tried to get to her again, but she beat the Bludger at him once more. For the following hour, whenever Sirius or James flew near her, they had to dodge the Bludger. "That's it," Sirius said. "Prongs, I'm off." He gathered his things and flew off to Gryffindor Tower.

Taryn flew close to the ground and fell off her broom, dropping the club. James landed and sat next to her in the newly fallen snow. "Hey, Tar," he said. "Are you all right? Did Snivellus do something?"

She started to cry. "No, James," she sniffed, sitting up. "It wasn't Snape. It was Malfoy. He said such awful things about Colleen and Remus and our family. And I was in such a good mood before."

"Why did you take your irritation out on Sirius?" he asked, pulling Taryn out of the snow and onto her feet. "He used to only make you laugh, but now, the two of you are almost always at each others' throats. Is everything all right with you both?"

She shook her head. Then she nodded. Then she shook her head again. She sighed and grabbed her broom. "I don't know, James," she cried. "I hate him for making me date Snape for so long. But I love him for respecting me enough to stop dating my sister when I asked even though he really liked her. But I hate him for being so self-centred and arrogant. But I love him for being Sirius Black and my friend…" She and James began to walk back to the castle. "I don't know why I take out my aggression on him when it isn't his fault. I just do. I can't explain it. For some reason, he is my outlet for every emotion that runs through me."

"Including love?" James asked as they reached the castle steps. She gave him a confused look. "You said he was your outlet for every emotion that runs through you. Does that include love?" She didn't answer. "I'm only asking because it seems like the two of you are either dating or married without realising it so neither of you get to enjoy the full benefits of either such arrangements."

……


	5. 4 Desparate for Attention

Chapter Four: Desperate for Attention

Sirius was grumbling violently when he collapsed into a chair in front of the Gryffindor Common Room fire. Remus, who was reading nearby, looked up and asked, "What's wrong, Padfoot?"

"You're cousin is completely barking mad, Moony," he muttered. "Absolutely insane." Remus gestured for him to continue. "Out on the pitch just now, she nearly killed me with a Bludger… What's got her knickers in a twist, anyway?"

Remus shrugged. "I don't know," he said. "She was literally _skipping_ when I told her… When she left the Room of Requirement this morning."

"What did you tell her?"

"Nothing."

"Tell me!"

"No. But maybe you should get her some Chocolate Frogs."

"Moony, you know she's a Chocolate Whore!"

Remus grinned and replied, "I know."

Sirius understood and grinned as well. "Oh, you're good," he said. "You're sick because she's your cousin. But you're good."

* * *

The next morning, Sirius waited anxiously for Taryn to come to breakfast. He had snuck to Honeydukes' Sweet Shop the night before and instead of buying her some Chocolate Frogs, he bought her a full pound of dark chocolate fudge. He didn't know what he had done to upset her, but he did want to make her happy again. It was for her smile he woke up every morning. He wasn't sure why he loved it so, but he was sure that he had missed it terribly.

So when she walked into the Great Hall that morning, Sirius thought an entire classroom had hit her with Cheering Charms. Unused to seeing her quite that happy, Sirius became extremely anxious about talking to her that day. She skipped happily to the Gryffindor Table and sat down in the empty seat beside Sirius. "Good morning," she said merrily, kissing Sirius on the cheek and hugging him tightly. Then she prepared to eat breakfast.

"Um, Taryn," Sirius said uncertainly, casting a confused glance on James and Remus, who both shrugged. "You're not in Gryffindor. Your table's over there."

"I _know_ that, silly," she said. "I decided to eat with _decent_ people." She munched on a slice of apple. She looked at Sirius who discreetly stashed away the box of fudge for use at a later date. But she must have seen it because she said, "Siri, what's that?"

"What?" he asked, feigning innocence and slipping the box to Remus under the table.

"That box," she said, reaching for it as it disappeared. Sirius grabbed her wrist. She lost her balance and fell onto his lap, giggling.

Remus kicked Sirius in the leg and jerked his head toward the double doors, silently, but slightly painfully, telling him to take Taryn out of the Great Hall. Sirius nodded and stood up, taking her with him. Gently holding her around the waist, he escorted Taryn to the Room of Requirement, where he placed her in a chair and said, "Tar, what in hell is your problem?"

She twisted a lock of her hair around her fingers and giggled. "I don't have a problem," she said. "Maybe you have the problem, love."

Sirius fell into a chair, facing her. "Taryn, I'm not the one who's giggling and playing with her hair," he said lightly. "And I'm not the one who sent a Bludger after her friends when all they wanted to do was talk to her. And I'm not the one who's confusing me right now. So, tell me, _love_, what's the deal?"

She acquired a very serious face and said, "Sirius Black, I'm surprised that you haven't figured it out by now." He gave her a look that said 'indulge me' and gestured for her to continue explaining. She got off her chair and sat on his lap, straddling him. His eyes widened as she slipped her arms around him neck and pulled him closer to her. "I thought it would be obvious by now," she whispered into his ear, running her tongue lightly along his earlobe. "_I've been bloody cursed, you frickin' idiot!_" she screamed in his ear.

He yelped in pain and pushed her off him, his ears ringing. He hated it when she screamed anything and when she was so close… He could pretty much say good-bye to his perfect hearing. "Cripes, Taryn!" he said, glaring down at her. She was sitting on the floor at his feet, her skirt hiked up past her knees and revealing more of her legs than she probably would have liked. "What the devil is _wrong_ with you?"

"Well, _Sirius_," she spat, glaring up at him. "Some bloody idiot went and placed a curse—with which I am unfamiliar, by the way—on me while I was sleeping! I didn't realise it until you stashed that box of whatever it is under the table to Remus. It makes me very happy, and it makes me act out of character and it makes me do things that you _know_ I would never do if I was in my right mind." She sighed and brushed her hair from her face. "It must be weakening, though. I feel much better. And if you have some sort of thing to make me miserable in that stupid box of yours, you can return it to wherever you found it unless you want to spend the rest of eternity dealing with Complexes."

Sirius sat on the floor beside her and looked intently into her eyes. "Taryn," he said softly. "Are you all right?" He could see tears forming in her eyes. She looked down at her exposed knees, but didn't pull her skirt down. "I'm serious. Are you all right?"

She looked at him and shook her head. "Siri, I'm so confused," she whispered. "I don't know what to do anymore. I don't even know what to think." Her tears spilled over and she cried into her hands.

He pulled her into his arms and held her as she cried into his shirt. "Tell me what's wrong, Tar," he murmured. "Maybe together we can sort it out."

"Not this time, Siri," she said, her pain coming through to her voice. "I can't even tell Remus this. I have to figure it out on my own." She looked up at him. "But thanks for offering."

He nodded. "Don't mention it," he said softly, his gaze lost in hers. Slowly, he leaned towards her. But she turned her face away, so when he should have kissed her tempting lips, his met her soft cheek. Seeing he was cheated something he wasn't aware he really wanted, he decided to get a bit of revenge. So he licked her cheek sloppily.

"Ech!" she cried, pushing him away. "Sirius Black, you are intolerable!" She stood, pulled her skirt down proper and stormed out of the room, leaving an amused Sirius sitting on the floor.

* * *

g 

Over the course of the next two weeks, Taryn endured the harassment of her fellow Slytherins, all believing the lies Lucius Malfoy was feeding them. Whenever any of her friends saw her, she was in the Room of Requirement, nearly fuming in her rage. She couldn't handle all of it. And she knew it. The sad part was that she had no idea what to about it.

"Why are you always in here?" Sirius asked Taryn after he found her sitting in a chair by the fire, throwing bits of parchment into it. A large red winged armchair appeared next to her green dining one. He sat and noticed every bit of parchment had someone's name on it. "What are you doing?" he asked as she tossed a piece of parchment with his name on it into the fire.

"Shh," she said. "Just wait. You'll see." A warm sensation overcame Sirius. It was pleasant at first, but then it began to hurt. A _lot_. It felt as though every cell in his body was on fire and screaming in utter agony.

"Oh!" he cried out in pain. "Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow! Make it stop! Make it _stop_!" Smoke started to issue from his shirt collar. The stench of burning hair filled the room.

She glanced at him and smirked. "Stop being such a baby," she said, dryly. Sirius' parchment dissolved into ash and the burning stopped. He sighed and wiped beads of sweat from his forehead. "Better?" she inquired, standing and walking over to her cabin bed.

"Yeah," he muttered. "What was that?"

"A particularly fun curse Professor Flitwick talked about in class last week," she explained, getting into the bed. "Don't you even _try_ to pay attention to the lessons?" She pointed her wand at the fire and the ashes stirred.

Sirius doubled over in a fit of laughter. "Stop it," he said, tears rolling down his cheeks. "That tickles!"

Taryn raised her wand and his tickling ceased. "What does?" she asked innocently. "This?" She stirred the ashes again.

"Yes," he growled, leaping onto the bed and tackling her. Sirius wrenched her wand from her and threw it across the room. His tickling stopped again and he collapsed on Taryn, his head resting on her chest, exhausted from being burned then tickled mercilessly. He breathed slowly and deeply, trying to regain control over his body once again.

Taryn wiggled under him. "Get off," she said.

He shook his head, taking in her enticing scent of cedar. "No," he said. "I don't have the energy. Thanks to you." She sighed and began running her fingers through his hair lightly. He chuckled a little. "That tickles, too," he said softly. She stopped. "But don't stop." She resumed her absentminded activity. Sirius sighed quietly and closed his eyes. He loved this. He had her attention physically, but not mentally. But he wanted her full-undivided attention. Call him selfish, but it was the truth. "Hey, Taryn?" he asked sleepily.

"Hm?" she replied, just as sleepy.

Sirius quickly gathered his thoughts. "Do you like me?" he asked, fighting back the urge to yawn.

She stopped running her fingers through his hair and seemed to freeze a little. "Why?" she asked slowly, almost guardedly.

"Because I really want to kiss you right now," he said before thinking about it. Instantly, he wished he hadn't said it. He knew all too well how she felt about relationships and kissing. And, truthfully, he wasn't sure _why_ he said it at all. He was sure he wanted to kiss her, but he was almost certain that he was being a typical male who was merely trying to satisfy his physical desires. He was fairly certain that he didn't exactly like Taryn in that way. At least, not in the way he had like her sister. It was _Taryn_, for cripe's sake!

"Well, don't," she muttered, falling asleep, her fingers still running through his hair.

Sirius settled to go to sleep, using her as a warm, rhythmic pillow, when the door opened and James and Remus and Peter walked in, talking. "Shh!" Sirius hissed at them, his eyes still closed. "She's asleep."

James sauntered over and smirked at his best friend. "And what are you doing?" he asked. "Pretending that you really _don't_ want to shag her?"

"I'm not even going to honour that question with a response, Prongs," Sirius muttered as Taryn snuggled closer to him. "Besides, it's really comfortable on this bed. She sure knows how to pick them out, that's certain."

James looked over at Remus, who looked as though he was determined not to see Sirius in the same bed as his closest cousin. "Can you believe it, Moony?" James asked. "He's practically _admitting_ that he likes her!"

Remus shook his head. "No, I think he's just admitting that he's desperate for some attention," he replied, making Peter snort with loud laughter. "Wormtail, if you wake her up, I will not stop her from taking irritated action."

……


	6. 5 I'm Not Perfect!

Chapter Five: I'm Not Perfect!

Choosing to hide instead of endure the wrath of the Slytherins, Taryn took to sleeping in the Room of Requirement for the last two weeks of term. Occasionally, she would be joined by either Sirius or Remus until about midnight, when they would disappear to their own dormitories for one reason or another. However, one night, two days before they would be going home for holiday, she was joined by both of them.

"I'll be back," she said, stretching and walking lazily out of the Room of Requirement.

Sirius turned to Remus once he was certain she was out of earshot. "All right, spill it," he demanded. "What's going on?"

Remus looked up from his book. "What're you talking about?" he asked, slipping a piece of parchment between the pages as a bookmark. "Going on where?"

"You know what I'm talking about," Sirius said, stalking over to Remus and leaning over him in the chair. "What's going on with _you_? You're sneaking glances at her. Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about, because you do! Tell me the truth, Remus!"

The Werewolf sighed and dropped his book to the floor. He ran a hand through his hair and said, "I'm sorry, Sirius…" He wouldn't meet Sirius' gaze.

"Merlin…" Sirius said softly, backing away from his best friend. He was no less than shocked. "You do realise you can't do anything about it, right?" Remus nodded. "She's your cousin, Remus!"

"I know that!" Remus said sharply, standing and beginning to pace the room. "There's not a day that's gone by that I don't realise that, Sirius. She's my cousin, yes, I know, but I can't help it!" He sighed violently, then finally looked at Sirius. "_You_ of all people should realise the hold she can unknowingly have on someone!"

Sirius slammed his fist into the stone wall beside him. "Dammit, Remus!" he said loudly. "I love her!"

"So do I!"

The door opened suddenly and Taryn was standing in the doorway, looking between the two of them, her night-robe slipping off one shoulder. "Is everything all right?" she asked, obviously seeing the tension between her friends. Neither answered, so she shrugged and walked over to her usual bed and climbed in, dropping her robe on her chair nearby. "I suppose you're not going to tell me. That's all right. Your business is your own." She sighed and lay back, draping a leg over the side of the bed.

Sirius walked over to her. "What are you thinking about, Tar?" he asked her, seeing the concentration in her eyes.

"I was just thinking about the Pureblood marriages that have been happening lately," she said, lost in thought. "And I know that it's usually second cousins that can marry without their children having any physical or mental side-affects… But I was curious to know if first cousins could do the same. Like if Sirius had the sudden urge to marry Narcissa or Bellatrix or Andromeda…" She caught sight of his face. "Yes, I know they're all engaged or married. It was just an example. Do you think your children would be normal, or would they be deformed or something?"

"I… don't know," Sirius answered weakly.

Taryn sat up and looked over at Remus who had resumed his task of reading his book. "Midnight, what do you think?" she asked, drawing his attention to her.

"Why do you need to know?" he asked, almost guardedly. "Does it really matter?"

"No," she shook her head. "I was just wondering, that's all."

* * *

On the train to London, the Marauders—as the boys cryptically called themselves without telling the girls why—and the girls shared a compartment, talking animatedly with each other for the most part. Remus, Sirius and Taryn had snatched the three seats closest to the large window and had taken to staring through the glass and not speaking. The boys were wondering if she had overheard their conversation before she had returned from brushing her teeth that night in the Room of Requirement and she was wondering if she would have _any_ company during the holiday.

Taryn silently listened to the others' conversation as she stared out the window. They were discussing their plans for the holiday. James and Lily were going to his grandparents' for Christmas, then to her grandparents' for New Year's. Peter was staying home. Colleen was going to visit the Love grandparents, leaving Taryn alone at their house to watch over things there. At one point, James made some mention about Sirius joining the Potters for the holiday, but it didn't register with Taryn. She knew Remus was going to the Lupin grandparents' for the holiday and that her older sister, Cora, a Muggle, would be with her husband's family. So, in a nutshell, Taryn would be spending the entire two weeks away from Hogwarts alone in her parents' large house.

She sighed and lightly banged her head against the glass, unintentionally drawing attention to herself. "Tar, what's wrong?" Lily asked. "Why are you banging your head against the window?"

Taryn looked at the others in the compartment, all looking at her, waiting for a reply. "Nothing's wrong," she said softly. "I was just remembering all the things I have to do when I get to my parents' house. You know, things the House-Elves can't do themselves. Don't worry about it."

"Is that what you'll be doing over holiday, then?" James asked. "Spending it alone in that castle of a house with three House-Elves and no one else? Just taking care of the finances that need to be dealt with?"

She nodded. "Yeah, pretty much," she said. She could see them all thinking quickly to invite her to join them. "But, don't ask me to join you. If I do, nothing will get done at the house. I'll be all right. I'll rent some movies for Christmas. Don't worry about me." She managed a weak smile, then returned to staring out the window, but as her eyes travelled from all of her friends to the landscape beyond the glass, they met a pair of particularly intense grey ones—Sirius was staring at her, making her slightly uncomfortable.

The remainder of the train ride was uneventful. But, as the train pulled into King's Cross Station, Platform 9 ¾, Sirius grabbed Taryn's wrist gently and hastily whispered, "I need to speak with you."

"Okay," she muttered, pulling her coat from her suitcase she used for Christmas holiday as the others pulled their own suitcases out of the compartment. "Talk to me, Sirius."

"Alone, Taryn."

She threw a glance over her shoulder. The compartment was empty. "We are alone," she hissed. "Unless you think one of them has James' Invisibility Cloak—"

"I do," he said, grabbing his suitcase and hers and dragging them out of the compartment and off the train.

Rolling her eyes and muttering in slight annoyance, Taryn followed him into the Muggle area of the Station. "Sirius," she said, running to catch up with her bag. "What is this all about?"

Sirius stopped walking, dropped their bags and sighing, looking down at the ground. "You don't eavesdrop, do you?" he asked.

"You've known me since we were twelve and you're asking me this _now?_" she asked, her eyebrows raised. "I thought you already knew that I don't. It's entirely rude."

He sighed in relief. "Okay," he said. "But, if you happened to overhear a heated conversation in a room you were going to be entering anyway, would you stop and listen for a bit?"

"Sirius Black, what are you talking about?"

"Nothing," he said. "Forget about it. Your escort's here, Taryn."

She turned around and saw Mr. Ollivander, a close friend of her father's family, walking towards her. He was an older man with wide, pale eyes and uncommonly long, white fingers. He was smiling eerily at Taryn and Sirius as he walked toward them. Taryn would never come out right and say it, but Mr. Ollivander made her uncomfortable. She supposed it must have been the look his eyes took when she bought her first wand from him. But that didn't stop her from being nice to him. "Mr. Ollivander," she said pleasantly. "I suppose my grandparents insisted you escort me to Diagon Alley?"

He nodded, his eyes flitting over Sirius quickly. "Sirius Black," he said. "You've seemed to have gotten much taller since I saw you last. It's been five and a half years since you bought your wand, hasn't it?"

Sirius nodded. "Yes, sir," he said.

"I remember every wand I've ever sold, Mr. Black," Mr. Ollivander continued as though Sirius hadn't spoken. Taryn licked her lips and bounced on her toes, waiting impatiently. "Tell me. Does your brother, Regulus, still use the Maple and unicorn hair, twelve inches, good for curses? Or has he replaced it yet?"

Sirius's eyes clouded over at the sound of his younger brother's name. In fact, it had been the first time in years since Taryn had heard it herself. Regulus didn't attend Hogwarts, but went to Durmstrang and Taryn had never met him and Sirius talked of him even less than any of them saw him. "Mr. Ollivander," she said, reading Sirius' expression. "Regulus doesn't attend Hogwarts and I'm sure Sirius sees very little of him. There is the possibility that he has purchased a replacement wand for whatever reason, but he may still be using your wand, sir. Shall we continue on to Diagon Alley, then? I must get home as soon as possible."

Mr. Ollivander nodded and picked up her suitcase. "Say good bye to Mr. Black, Miss Love," he said, walking away.

"I'm sorry, Sirius," she said. "Sometimes he just has no tact. He's always more curious about where his wands have got to than about everything else."

"Don't make excuses for him," Sirius snapped. "I left home for a _reason_, Taryn!" He grabbed his suitcase, turned sharply and began walking over to where the Potters had congregated. "Have a happy Christmas, Taryn," he said coldly over his shoulder.

"You too," she muttered, following after Mr. Ollivander. "Jerk."

"What was that?" Mr. Ollivander asked, obviously hearing her mutterings.

"Nothing."

* * *

Once she had shot out of the large fireplace in the library, stood and dusted herself off, Taryn lifted her head towards the high ceiling and yelled, "Sine! Aibhlin! Dougal! Get in here!" Immediately, three House-Elves appeared before her. "Good. Dougal, take this." She handed her suitcase to the male Elf with large floppy ears and began walking out of the library, the Elves following her. "All right, you three, I'm in a rotten mood because of our dear friend Sirius Black and I need things to happen quickly so I can actually enjoy the time off from school. All right. Sine, I need you to go into the study and prepare my desk for going over my parents' wills. Off you trot." The smallest female Elf with a button nose bowed and ran off to the study. "Aibhlin, you go to the kitchen and fix something to eat. I've been craving a turkey, bacon and guacamole sandwich for about two months, so make that. With a side of fresh fruit and a tall glass of pumpkin juice—no water. Send it to the study in twenty minutes. Go now." Aibhlin, the other female Elf with big amber eyes, bowed and ran off to the kitchen. "And Dougal, after you take my things up to my room, see me in the study, I have a short list of appointments for you to make for me. You may go." Dougal bowed and disappeared with the suitcase.

Taryn walked into the nearest broom closet, shut the door tightly, tilted her head towards the Quidditch robes her family had collected over the years and screamed for a few minutes until she felt better. Then she went promptly to the study. James had overstated when he called her house a castle. It was just a large house. Not a manor. Not a mansion. Definitely not a castle. Just a larger than average house. And she loved it. Unless it was empty. Then she hated it with a great intensity.

Inside the study, Sine was busy laying out the documents and papers all concerning the two wills of her parents that still needed to be gone over by Taryn, Cora and Colleen. But Cora and Colleen had said that they trusted Taryn to take care of all of it and left it to her. So now, all she needed was an inheritance administrator from the Ministry of Magic to help her go through all the legal issues surrounding the dispersement of the three inheritances. She hadn't had a full opportunity to thoroughly read either will, so she had no idea who would be getting what and how much money would be going where.

She flopped into her chair and rubbed her temples, feeling a headache coming on already. Sine looked up at her. "Are you all right, Miss Taryn?" she asked. "Surely you don't have a head-pain already? We haven't started yet."

"So you've noticed, have you?" Taryn muttered. "Sine, I really don't want to be the one to do this. I don't want to go through their wills, separate their belongings to the people who've inherited them and see the things I've grown up with leave the one place where they belong—here. It only confirms that they're really gone and not just away on business. I don't think I can handle that."

"But, Miss," Sine said, climbing up onto the desk so she could better see into Taryn's eyes. Sine was Taryn's personal Elf and was, therefore, allowed to do that. "Master Dagonet and Mistress Elaine were killed last January. You cannot pretend that they are still alive, Miss. You need to tend to the wills, Miss. They would want you to."

"No," Taryn sighed. "They would want Cora to do it. Not me. After all, she's the one who doesn't have to worry that much about You-Know-Who as long as she keeps her nose out of other people's business. She doesn't have to go away to school and leave everything unsettled here while she's gone. She's married. She's an adult. She's more mature than I can ever hope to be. She can handle this. I can't." Tear that she had been fighting with broke to the surface and spilled over onto her cheeks.

"Taryn, what on earth is wrong?" She gasped, startled; she hadn't heard anyone at the door, or at the library fireplace or noticed that she had left the study door open. She looked up and saw Remus standing in the doorway, looking at her with concern in his eyes.

She stood on shaky legs and walked around the desk, furiously wiping away her tears. "Remus," she said. "I wasn't expecting you. What're you doing here?"

"I should be asking you the same thing," he said. "You shouldn't be here during the holiday. You should've gone with Colleen to Grandma Love's house or come with me to Grandpa Lupin's house! Come on, it's the second hour of holiday and already, you're crying. Let's go."

She shook her head. "I can't, Remmie," she whispered. "I can't. I have to sort out the wills. And I have to pay off the debts I still have from their funerals… And I have to figure out the expenses to keep Colleen in school after she graduates from Hogwarts, whatever she may want to do. And I have to figure out if I can afford to keep the House-Elves or not. I may have to sell them or something." Fresh tears slipped down her cheeks and she fell against the desk behind her.

Remus quickly crossed the study to Taryn and pulled her into a tight and warm hug. "Stop it," he said gently, but firmly. "That's enough crying. I know it's not fair that you were suddenly burdened with keeping the Love household, but Taryn, you _can_ do this. You will pull through. If you put your mind to it. But, you'll never make it if you keep up this crying nonsense. Aunt Elaine and Uncle Dagonet would be proud of you if they could see you now. You take better care of Colleen than anyone else in the same situation could. You've been a stable support to her this entire year. Don't start beating yourself up about how you 'could be doing better'. The truth is, you can't. There's nothing more that you can do that you haven't already done. The last thing you need to do is start stressing yourself out." He lifted her chin and looked in her eyes. "Do you understand me, love?"

"Stop it," she whispered, pushing him away. "Stop being so perfect. Stop knowing all the right answers. _Please…_ Just… stop." She fell to her knees, then leaned against the desk, drawing her knees up to her chest, holding them and resting her chin on them.

Remus sat beside her. "Taryn, what are you talking about?" he asked softly.

"Godric, Remus," she muttered, not looking at him, turning her face away from him. "You know I don't like to listen in on other people's conversations. I'm sorry. I-I didn't mean to… You and Sirius were yelling and the door wasn't closed properly—and even if it was, it isn't sound proof… I didn't mean to overhear it… I swear, I didn't want to." She looked up at him with tear-filled eyes. He looked pale and almost horrified. "But I need to know… Who were you talking about?"

He seemed to be thinking quickly. "Godric…" he whispered. "Taryn, does it matter who we were talking about?" She nodded slowly. "Why do you need to know?"

"Is 'because' an adequate answer?" she asked, trying to skirt the real issue behind her questions.

He shook his head. "Never has been," he replied resolutely. "Tell me why you need to know and I will tell you what you want to know."

She hesitated before answering. She knew that if she told him the truth, he would object, telling her to listen to herself and then she would see why that it was a bad idea. She knew if she lied, he would see through it in an instant and not tell her. But she knew if she told the truth, he may or may not be happy for her. If he wasn't happy for her, he would try to dissuade her from it. But if she lied, he would reprimand her for it. He was always keeping her in check. She sighed and looked across the room. Her gaze fell on a portrait of her parents that was hanging over the fire. They seemed to tell her that it was okay to tell Remus the truth. He was her cousin and closest friend, after all. He deserved to know the truth.

She sighed again and looked Remus in the eyes. "I'm not going to lie to you, Remmie," she said quietly. "But you have to know this is difficult for me to say. You've always been protective of me for whatever reason. And while part of me appreciates that aspect of your character, another part of me wants you to leave me to live my own life. But, as you won't tell me what I need to know, I should tell you why I do…" She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. When she opened her eyes, she said so soft she wasn't sure he could hear her, "I love him."

"Sirius, you mean?" he asked as a light of great disappointment filled his eyes, but was gone in the same instant. She nodded, studying his face carefully. "I see…" he said quietly. Then he was himself again. "Well, then. You upheld your end of the bargain. Holds fair now that I return the favour."

Taryn shook her head, her fingertips on his mouth, silencing him. "Don't," she said. "It doesn't matter anymore. I think I just needed to tell someone the truth after hiding it for so long." She stood and ran her tongue over her front teeth. "Sine, put this away. Aibhlin, take the food back to the kitchen. I'll have it tomorrow. Dougal, the list is on the desk. I'm going to bed. See you at school, Remmie." She turned and walked to the door.

"Taryn, wait," he said, his hand on hers. She turned to see him directly behind her. "I didn't mean to upset you. If I have—"

She put her fingers on his mouth again. "You've never upset me, Remus," she said softly. "You just make me think in different ways. Whether or not that's a bad thing is yet to be decided." She reached up and kissed him gently on the cheek. Then she turned and walked away to the stair leading to the large and spacious attic, her bedroom.

"I'm not perfect, Taryn!" he called after her. "I'm far from it!"

She merely smiled as she climbed the stairs.

……


	7. 6 Mind, Body, Heart and Soul

Chapter Six: Mind, Body, Heart and Soul…

During the next few weeks, Taryn spent most of her time in the attic that was her bedroom. It was huge and was equipped with everything she would need—including a bathroom with a working toilet and shower and a miniature kitchen. She spent Christmas locked in her room, silently opening the gifts from her friends, sisters and grandparents. Cora sent her a new black scarf she had knitted herself, embroidering the word Love on it in brilliantly emerald green. Colleen sent her a new watch that Taryn knew Colleen knew she had been eyeing for a while. James sent her a broomstick servicing kit. Peter sent her a box of Chocolate Frogs and a few boxes of Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans; she kept the Chocolate Frogs, but let the House-Elves devour the Beans. Sirius sent her a full pound of Honeydukes chocolate fudge, which she stashed in her secret hiding place in her room to eat slowly and save forever. Both sets of her grandparents sent her things she knew she would never use—the reason: they were _pink_.

But it was Remus' gift that sent her into peals of giddy giggling and mad jumping on the bed. He had sent her the one thing that she had wanted above all else—the Complete Adventures of Sherlock Holmes by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, fully typed up exactly as the originals written by the famed author himself _and_ annotated by the Heads of the British Literature Department of Oxford University. As the extremely large two-volume set fell onto her lap from the Christmas wrapping, she gasped quite audibly, took up the heavy books, stood on her bed and began jumping for sheer joy. "Godric! I love him!" she cried out, clutching the beloved books to her chest.

"Who is it you love, Miss?" Sine asked, entering the room and beginning to collect the discarded wrapping.

"Remus!" Taryn replied, without realising she probably had to explain more to the Elf. She flopped onto her back, the impact of the books on her chest forcing the air out of her lungs in a _whoosh!_

Sine raised an eyebrow as she gathered up the paper. "Why is it you love Master Remus, Miss?" she asked innocently.

Taryn sighed and smiling, replied, "He's my best friend in the entire existence of wizard and man kind. He knows exactly how to make me happy and… He got me the one thing that I've wanted for most of my life but no one has ever gotten for me until today. He's known I've wanted them since we were eight. I think he didn't have enough gold to actually buy them until this year…" She sighed, content. "He's so good to me. I don't deserve it…"

"Well, if he asks for your hand, you ought to be gentle with him, Miss," Sine said absently. "I know you love him as your cousin and your best friend, but he has a gentle heart. And they say that wolves mate for life."

Taryn sat up suddenly and stared at her Elf. "Say that again," she said slowly, setting the books aside.

"He has a gentle heart," Sine said hesitantly. "They say wolves mate for life? Is that it?"

"Partly," Taryn said. "What was the first thing you said? About I ought to be gentle with him."

Sine thought for a moment and replied, "If he asks for your hand, you ought to be gentle with him, Miss. He has a gentle heart and wolves mate for life."

"What do you mean by that?" Taryn demanded as Aibhlin and Dougal entered, carrying covered trays containing her Christmas dinner. "Sine, explain yourself!"

The little House-Elf looked worried that she might have upset her Miss. "I was only being conversational, Miss," she said, staring down at her feet. "I didn't mean anything by it. I just noticed the way he looks at you, Miss, that's all. He's far more gentler with you than he is with Miss Colleen or Miss Cora."

Taryn looked at the other Elves who had set the trays down beside the bed. "What is she talking about?" Taryn demanded of them. "Aibhlin?"

Aibhlin looked quickly at Dougal and Sine before answering. "We've been watching Master Remus when he comes here, Miss," she said softly. "He speaks softer to you. He looks at you longer than he should. He seems to comfort you more than he comforts Miss Colleen though he's seen her cry more than he's seen you cry, Miss."

"I did some reading while you were away at Hogwarts, Miss," Dougal said, climbing onto the bed. "I read about Wolves and Werewolves. The Werewolf takes on similar behavioural tendencies the Wolf has. The way they chose their mates is nearly exactly the same. Wolves will choose mates within their own pack and they mate for life. Some wizards speculate that this may also be true with Werewolves, though they have yet to see a Werewolf choose a mate from his or her own family. But, we believe, Miss, that Master Remus might possibly have chosen you for his mate."

Aibhlin and Sine climbed onto the bed beside Dougal and the three looked intently at their Miss. Sine hesitantly stepped forward. "Miss?" she said softly. "Miss, are you all right?"

Taryn didn't answer. She was staring at the wall beyond them and thinking. Remus was the one that was always there when she needed to cry. Except that once when it was Sirius. Remus was the one that always brought her in from the rain. He always was there when she needed someone to talk to. He was always there to bring her out of the slumps. He was always there to make her laugh. He was always there when she needed to vent about how hateful the other Slytherins were. He was always there… He was always there…

A tapping at the window brought her out of her reverie. Dougal jumped over to the smallish window and opened it, allowing Remus' small ochre owl, Puck, to hop in and deliver a rather thick letter. Dougal took it from him and Puck flew away. As Dougal handed the letter to Taryn, Aibhlin shut the window. Taryn looked at the familiar handwriting on the letter and sighed. "Aibhlin, Dougal, take the food and put it in the icebox in my little kitchen. Then all of you please leave. I have a feeling this letter is going to tell me more than I want to share with you." The House-Elves bowed and obeyed, quickly leaving when their tasks were completed.

Taryn slit open the parchment envelope and slid the letter out, unfolding the two-foot-long letter. "Oh, Godric," she muttered as she discovered that he had written in a minute size. "Well, Taryn, ol' girl. You have to read it. Whether or not you have to respond is another question to consider at a later date." She took a deep breath and held the letter under the candle beside her and began to read.

_Dearest Nightfall—_she chuckled at seeing his shaky hand on her nickname—_I found that I couldn't sleep, for knowing you were spending this Christmas alone and lonely. I've discovered as of late that you have been at the foremost of my thoughts and I couldn't think of anything else to do but write to you._

_You know as well as I that I am far from being perfect. Why you claim I am, I will possibly never know. There are so many flaws to my character that I can scarce count them all. Far be it from me to proclaim myself as 'perfect'. But for you to say it… For a reason unknown to me, when you yelled at me for being 'so perfect,' I could feel all the hateful words you had ever utter in my direction forcing themselves back into my memory and the pain they brought me forced itself into my heart. I wish to know, therefore, why you said it._

_There is a great deal that I must tell you. However, before I continue on, Grandpa Lupin is requiring me to spread to you the Christmas message he spews at us every year. By now, you must have it memorised. But, I must do as he commands._

Taryn skimmed the Christmas message that she already knew would be coming to her in the long letter from their Grandpa Lupin, then continued reading.

_Forgive the interruption, as I said, Grandpa Lupin is not to be trifled with. Of course, you already know this._

_Love, you were honest with me, so it holds fair that Ibe honest with you. What you overheard from that night in the Room of Requirement, I'm sure, was the first argument between Padfoot and myself with many such like it to come. I don't wish to argue with him, but you know Padfoot as well as I do, and he may insist on it._

_However, you have the right to know what I am about to tell you. And this is probably harder for me to confess than it was for you to do the same. You see, the damning thing is that you and I are far too clever to allow the other to date those that would only hurt us. As much as I don't approve of Sirius for you, I'm sure you will disapprove my choice even further._

_But, she is the most beautiful creature I have ever seen. She is intelligent in ways I know not. She is unafraid to defend her friends or herself in any given situation. She, not unlike yourself, adores the rain and tends to go out and play in it. If I could earn her good will, I know that she could make me happy and I could watch over her properly._

_As you said, it is difficult to tell you this. But, I cannot hide it from you anymore, dear heart. You would discover it in time, anyway. Yes, Sirius and I were arguing in the Room of Requirement about a girl. You know her better than you think… Godric, I didn't think it would be so difficult to tell you the truth, Taryn. You, of all people, I should be able to tell anything._

_The girl he and I were arguing about is you._

_There, I told you. I love you, Taryn. I love you more than words can adequately describe. You are in my whole being. You are in my heart deeper than any other person I know. You are in my soul. You are what gives me strength to carry on every day. You are my constant. You are my one true love._

_And yet, I know I cannot force you into anything. If you do not wish it, you only need tell me so and I will let the matter drop._

_I hope you are enjoying your Christmas._

_Love, Midnight_

Taryn dropped the letter and fell back onto her bed, staring at the ceiling. "Oh… Godric," she muttered, rubbing a hand over her face. "Godric!"

"I hope I'm not interrupting anything, Taryn."

She sat up quickly and looked over at the stairs leading up from her door. Sirius was standing at the top of them. She got off her bed and stormed over. Pushing him down the stairs, she growled, "You bastard son of a bitch!"

He stumbled backward down the stairs. "Bloody hell, wench!" he said as he nearly found his death on the stairs. He climbed back up and walked towards her, backing her into a wall. "What the hell is your problem, Taryn? Every time you're upset, you try to kill me! What did I ever do to you?"

Her back hit the wall of her bedroom. She glared up at him. "It's because you're you," she spat. "If you would just leave my family _alone_, I would greatly appreciate it! You've been nothing but grief to us—_all_ of us! Remus too! Godric, you can't seem to let us live in peace, can you?"

"What are you on about?" Sirius demanded. "What are you talking about?"

"You've lied to my sister to get me to notice you!" she screamed. "You're arguing with Remus over a stupid girl! And you're constantly tormenting me when all I've ever done is like you—maybe even _love_ you! But, now, I can see that I've hoped too much from you. You will never be anything more than a selfish, self-centred, egotistical, arrogant, trouble-making ass! You will never give my family peace! You will constantly serve as a reminder that all the women in the family of Love will forever be bound by the curse of Magic and Love! Godric! Will you just leave me alone?"

Sirius stared at her. **_"What?"_** he asked loudly. He took Taryn by the shoulders and shoved her onto her bed. "Explain to me what you just said."

"I don't see why I should," Taryn muttered, folding her arms and looking out the window. "Maybe the Elves were right. Maybe it would be better if I was with Remus instead of waiting for you to wake up to what's going on around you."

"Taryn, what are you talking about?" he asked, turning her to face him. He took her hands in his tight grip. "What are you saying? That you're in love with me?"

"Get a grip, Sirius," she muttered. He smirked. She read the smirk properly, grabbed his shoulders and pinned him to the bed underneath her. With her free hand, she rummaged in the secret cupboards in the walls next to her bed. "Don't get any ideas, Black. Aha! Here it is!" She pulled a small vial containing a clear liquid in it out of the cupboard. She smiled, bit the cork and pulled it out, dropping it on his chest.

"What is that?" he asked warily.

"Veritaserum," she said brightly. He gave her a strange look. "Oh, don't give me that look. You know I'm good at potion brewing. Open your mouth." He obeyed, begrudgingly. She dropped three drops into his mouth and made him swallow. "Can you hear me?"

"Yes…"

"Good," she said, returning the cork to the vial. "Who were you arguing with Remus about in the Room of Requirement?"

"Taryn Love…"

"Why?"

"Because he was sneaking glances at her when she wasn't looking and I didn't like it…"

"Surely you don't care if he's attracted to her?"

"No, I care a great deal…"

"Why?"

"I love her…"

This news took Taryn aback. Sirius Black just said, under influence of a strong truth potion, that he loved her. _Time to test the waters a bit,_ she thought. "How much do you love her?"

"With all my mind, body, heart and soul…"

"Would you ask her to marry you?"

"If I knew she loved me in return, then yes…"

"Okay, I've heard enough," she said, getting off of Sirius. She pulled another vial out of a secret cupboard and poured a bit of its contents into his mouth. "Sirius, wake up."

He shook his head and rubbed his eyes. "What did you force out of me?" he asked.

"Only that you'll love me until the end of eternity," she said casually.

His face turned bright red. "Godric," he muttered. "I was going to save that for the next Hogsmeade trip."

"It's all right, Sirius," she said. "But the question now remains: will you be able to tolerate having me for the rest of eternity? Because I'm more than willing to let you."

"Taryn, what are you talking about?" he asked.

"In my family, the Love women are under a curse," she said. "The first man we ever kiss as a woman will be the man we will spend the rest of eternity with. Say, I kiss you. You and I would be together until the end of time. If we get in a fight, break up and date other people, we will still come back to each other. Does that make sense?"

"Yes…" he said slowly. "You would let _me_ give you your first kiss?"

"Hell no," she said. "I'd _take_ it from you."

"What are you t—" but he didn't finish his sentence. Because at that instant, Taryn pulled him to her and kissed him.

……


	8. 7 I Didn't Mean to Say That

Chapter Seven: I Didn't Mean to Say That…

"I'll take three," Taryn muttered, slipping three cards from her hand into the deck and taking three from it. "Anything for you, Siri?"

He slipped her two cards. "Just two," he muttered. She handed him two cards from the deck and he rearranged his cards. "Hey, Tar?"

"Yeah?" she answered absentmindedly. She was preoccupied with her cards. They were sticking together and she was trying desperately to get them in order. She decided to shuffle her hand and looked up at Sirius who was looking at her oddly. "What?"

"What was all that about?" he asked. "You know, when I first got here. When you flipped out."

She felt the colour drain from her face. "Oh, well," she muttered. "See… I wanted—and planned, actually—to spend the holiday alone here in the house and that had already been interrupted by Remus, who decided to show up within the first two hours of me being home. And then this morning, I received an unsettling letter and I really just needed to have some 'Taryn Time' to think everything through. And then you showed up and I just kinda freaked. I didn't mean to go crazy on you. I'm sorry."

He shrugged. "It's all right," he said. "I just wanted to make sure you were all right."

* * *

The rest of Taryn's holiday passed her by without event or catastrophe. She still had no idea what to do about her situation with her cousin, but she was certain that she could figure it out with the help of Professors McGonagall and Dumbledore if no one else. She didn't see her friends until after dinner the first night they returned to Hogwarts. They were all in the Room of Requirement, bored out of their skulls.

"I'm bored," Peter whined.

"We know."

"Then let's _do_ something!"

"What do you suggest?"

"Sneak into the girls' lavatory?"

"Been there, done that," Sirius said, absently running his fingers through Taryn's hair. They weren't an 'official' couple, but the rest of the group more or less got the vibe that they were together, even if certain individuals had slight problems with it.

James looked over from his giant red pouf where he was rubbing Lily's shoulders. "When'd you do that?" he asked. "And why wasn't I invited? Ow!" Lily had elbowed him.

"First year," Sirius yawned. "I was looking for Taryn to pick on her again."

"You didn't even know my _name_ then, Sirius!" she protested.

"I'm _bored!"_

"We know!" 

"Look, Peter, if you're so bored," Colleen said, flipping through the latest edition of _Witch Weekly_. "Then why don't you go to the Astronomy Tower and try to fly?" The others stared at her. "He wouldn't be so bored, then. He'd be more worried about whether or not he'd live."

"True."

The seven lapsed into bored silence for a few minutes until Remus stood, stretched and said, "Taryn, we should probably start our patrol now."

She looked at her watch and sighed heavily. Sometimes, she almost forgot she was a Slytherin Prefect. "I guess you're right," she muttered, getting to her feet. "See you all later." She and Remus left the Room of Requirement. "I hate Mondays," she muttered as they made their way to the third floor for their patrol. They had to patrol the corridors on Monday nights; that's why they would hang out on Wednesday nights instead.

"I know you do," he replied, adjusting his sweater. They walked in silence for nearly a half hour. "Um, Nightfall?" he asked finally.

"Yeah?"

"Did you get my letter over Christmas?" he asked timidly. He seemed to not want to know her reaction to it, but desperately needed to know her reaction equally. She nodded, but said nothing. They continued in slightly uncomfortable silence for a few minutes. "A-are you sure you got it, Nightfall?"

She stopped walking suddenly and turned to face him. "Yes, I got your letter, Midnight," she said sharply. "What else is there you want me to say? That I'm going to throw myself at your feet and beg for your forgiveness for even considering wanting to be with someone else? Forsake him for the rest of eternity? Or do you just want the full truth of the matter, Midnight? Tell me what you want!"

"The full truth of the matter?" he repeated. "What are you talking about?"

Her face coloured an insane shade of red and she bit on a fingernail. "I didn't mean to say that," she muttered.

"Taryn—"

"I don't want to talk about it!"

……


End file.
